Knowing Your Personal Borders And Boundaries

Have you ever experienced having someone in your face when they talk to you? So close that you get showered? When we are out networking, we usually find ourselves in a loud environment as people try to talk louder than the others to be heard. This results in a roar that makes regular conversation difficult.

Understanding Personal Borders and Boundaries

The tendency is that people would try to get very close to other people so they can be heard. Some people aren’t comfortable when another person is too close to them. It would even be more comfortable if one person had consumed alcohol and the other had not.

Having our “Comfort Zone”

Everyone has his comfort zone boundary. This is the space around us that if other people get into makes us feel uncomfortable. A good example of this is to recall if you ever got into an argument and someone got right up in your face and even tried to point his finger very near your face. So how did you feel? Usually, it would make a person angrier.

Boundaries and Business

In networking, it’s very important to maintain a certain distance from a person that you talk to. This distance should be almost an arms length. Most peoples comfort boundary is about the length of their arm. If you get very close to someone while talking to them, imagine raising your arm, and that is the distance that you should have between you. If the person you’re talking to will move closer during the conversation, then it’s clear that he’s fine with the proximity. So you can continue the conversation at that distance.

You’ll know if you are standing too close to someone if he moves back while you talk to him. If this happens, don’t move closer to them. They will stop when they reach the distance that they are comfortable with. If they turn and walk away of course it is time to find someone else to talk to.

This can be very important in building relationships with others. Remember that it makes no difference what you say to a person if they are not engaged in the conversation. Observing boundaries can help a lot in networking.

Knowing Your Personal Borders And Boundaries by Frank Woods. About the Author: You’ll find the pick of the litter with our bulldogs for sale.

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